Tae 3 - Puking at Ground Round

My unit received a call to respond to a local 'Ground Round' restaurant. Now if you aren't familiar with 'Ground Round,' they're just a chain of restaurants that push 'safe, family dining.' Usually you can find a clown or magician making the rounds in these restaurants - entertaining the kiddies. They also have a habit of serving freshly-popped popcorn as a munchie while you wait for your order.

The call came in as '55 year-old female, complaining of chest pain.' When we arrived, we were met at the door by the fire department, the restaurant manager, and 'Bobo' - the multi-colored clown. We were led to a table in the rear of the restaurant, where two elderly couples were dining. An elderly woman in ther mid-fifties (dispatch was right for once) looking pale, a little diaphoretic, complaining of 'heavy' chest pressure, and slight difficulty breathing. She already took her nitroglycerin - five of them, over a ten-minute period. "Five?" I said, getting out the bp cuff. "Well, they didn't seem to be working," was her reply. Usually, people are instructed to take _three_ of their nitros - maximum, and over fifteen minutes. My guess is that her blood pressure was pretty low after taking five of them in only ten minutes.

An aside:

When strange things happen in public places, isn't it strange that people ignore the situation, and carry on as if nothing is happening? The other diners at the restaurant, pointedly ignored us and the woman - although some sneaked side-long peeks. Some of the children just stared at us - until they were told by their parents not to...

I had just placed the cuff on her arm, when she said that she felt like vomiting. After making sure I wasn't in the line of fire, I quickly looked around...and saw nothing handy to grab. That is, until, a waitress rounded the corner carrying a tray loaded with baskets of freshly-popped popcorn. In one fluid motion, I grabbed one of the trays, dumped the popcorn on the ground, and slid the basket under the woman's chin just in time to catch her first heave. I then handed the basket to Bobo, who didn't look very happy to be receiving a partially digested 'surf 'n turf.'

We then negotiated the woman onto the stretcher, and started to wheel her out, navigating through the sea of tables and diners. We were just passing by a table with a family, when the patient puked again - this time on her lap. The children at the table looked at this woman in fascination, while the parents eyed each other - then their plates, and called for the check.

As we passed through the front doors of the restaurant, I noticed Bobo standing outside, having another cigarette. As I passed by him, I said, "Hey Bobo, can you do a trick for me?" "Fuck off," he hissed under his breath. Ah, everybody loves clowns.

- Tae

(Originally posted: Sun, 1 May 1994)